Drone loses DU round near Mecca

It has happened before, especially on Fridays, that American robots on their way to or returning from targets on the peninsula or the African horn have been straying into Arab airspace, but this is the first time that one of them was unloading upon it. It was not immediately clear whether the vehicle had already attacked other targets, but Arab airspace controllers said that it hastily returned to Djibouti after the drop. There are however rumours according to which an earlier incident of the same pattern above the Egyptian desert ended only with the honour suicide of the Hispanic pilot at a Navy facility in Unitedstates, and the Cairo regime bent to avoid any public mentioning of the radiation issue leaving the removal of the poison to later generations.

An official in Riyadh said: “We are routinely sending out customised signals designed to jam their geo-location channels once our radar notices them snatching into the airspace of our territorial waters, to make them like mosquitoes screwing in a light bulb. But we are not sending the op-codes to unlock ammunition, no, our specialists are working hard to try to neutralise these signals, because their pilots do not respect our faith and like to harass us on Fridays.” The statement suggested that if Arabia were to interfere with the kill commands coming in through stealth military satellites, for moral reasons it would only do so in a total knock-out form as not to leave any grain of ambiguity with its repeated calls for the pilots to be held accountable.

The incident occurred after the robot had been cruising for a while above a valley near Mecca covered with residential areas. Apparently, after a while the device lost orientation, or more precisely went to pass on spoof location data to its pilot suggesting it was above Al-Aqsa Mosque (that is what the national government has configured to be fed all the time in such situations), besides the unaltered camera feed for which it apparently had been straying there in the first place. Only a few minutes after the device began forwarding the obvious spoof meant as a diplomatic go-away hint to its pilot, it dropped the depleted uranium before it left into the direction of South-West. Since the so-called “emergency drop” does not make use of the ammunition´s guidance system, it could come down anywhere within a probabilistic cone underneath the flightpath.

But the inhabitants of Mecca county had luck and it merely kissed the asphalt. According to renegade technicians, besides the shooting the killer robot interface offers an op-code to drop ammunition, as to reduce the weight of a “drone” that otherwise would remain beyond its return range. But the same source also said there was an official policy prescribing the feature only to be used above international waters. So even if the pilot really assumed his vehicle was above Al-Aqsa Mosque, and might crash into the Red Sea when the fuel runs out before reaching Djibouti, to remain in line with his agency´s covert operation rules he would have had to fly it above what he would assume to be the Mediterranean or even beyond Sinai before discarding the payload to rescue the carrier system.

In a White House press briefing, a spokesperson said the incident might have occurred due to one of the windmill arrays in the coastal waters near Jiddah which the oil-rich country had been installing as an alleged energy diversification showcase a couple of years ago. “At this point we presume that the ´Wind Investment For Islam´ in the Red Sea is the most likely cause of the accident. Since there was no wind at the time, there was no energy in its power lines. In that condition such arrays serve as huge antennas amplifying any electromagnetic noise they catch up and echoing it in a distorted form that might harm military communication.” He did not elaborate however why the robot pilot steered his vehicle into the proximity of the stealth defence capacity in the first place if he had known that it was active at the time or whether a change of pilot had taken place while it was in the air.

An Ulema representative said on Saturday: “The depleted uranium attack represents a significant shift in Western policy and behaviour whose origins are rooted in the breach of secular international law by the 2003 war against Iraq. In the 1991 war we could still rely upon an element of sanity in our allies, which is no longer alive in the current American military doctrine. In the old days a tank that noticed it would be driving into a friendly village could be turned around to go against the enemy by a mere waving of a flag. In the current era, a robot that noticed it drove into a friendly town goes on until we are triggering a Return Path Insufficiency Error in its operation system, and maybe a Known Unknowns Handling Failure in an insane pilot. And such as we would send a hero with a magnetic device to stop the tank rather than spraying our territory with nuclear waste, we configure our firewalls to do with the aerial threat instead of shooting it down above our heads.”