Homeless Guy Rides Bike to Work

Area homeless man Jim "Whistlepants" Jenkins rode his bike to work today in celebration of Santa Cruz's annual Bike to Work Week. Slowly pushing a beat up, wobbly wheeled mountain bike to a Bike to Work site, Jenkins was greeted by local Bike to Work Week volunteers who offered coffee, bagels, and a massage. "Jenkins is a hero in my book," said volunteer Shirley McPhilistine. "He rides his bike everywhere."

A veteran from the first gulf war turned self-employed wanderer, Jenkins often rides his bike 8 to 10 miles a day, from his "squat" in the woods to downtown where he "busks" for change.

"I really care about the environment," Jenkins said, clutching a bagel and coughing between sips of hot coffee. "It's really important that we all work together to cut down on pollution and slow global warming," he added.

When asked if he had plans to get a more permanent place to stay, Jenkins offered, "The economy's really bad right now. I mean sure, I've been self-employed/on the bum for over ten years but I'm optimistic that with Obama in the white house, things are gonna improve. I do appreciate the help of the police department in keeping me on the ball, I mean, whenever I'm feeling down and wanna just sit and cry, they always tell me to keep moving. It's really considerate."

Former vice-mayor/career politician/snake oil salesman Ryan Coonerty had this to add, "A lot of people are under the impression that Bike to Work Week is just an excuse for propertied middleclass liberals to dress up in spandex and get all self-righteous about what they're doing to save the planet...nothing could be further from the truth. Bike to Work Week is about saying thanks, to all the people who sacrifice going to their dead end jobs in the comfort and luxury of a souped up, pimped out ride with spinning rims and 15 inch subwoofers...and just ride a bike instead."

Picah Mosner, executive director for local bicycle advocacy group Pedal Power agrees, "If everyone rode their bike as much as Mr. Jenkins does and for the same reasons, it would be a revolution." When asked if there's anything he'd change about how Jenkins' rides, he offered, "It would be nice if he wore a helmet."