Berkeley Patriots Rally fun

BY JINGOISM! OLD GLORY TO RULE THE DAY IN BERKELEY
Sunday afternoon, March 3, starting at 12:30 p.m., in Berkeley
(if you're confused by all this, see the explanation below)

Hey, all you lovers of home and country! We're seeing stars!!

Stars and Stripes, that is!!!

Guerrilla Queer Bar is pissing ourselves in anticipation of the
Berkeley Patriotic Rally and Bar Crawl Parade, March 3:
An unprecendented, utterly confounding, raucous, shitstirring,
apolitical, flagwaving romp in the Bay Area's most flag-deficient
zone.

As you may have noticed, the world is awash in flag paraphernalia and
rickrack. And well, we like to mock things.

So:

Swap your cynicism for jingoism!
Swap your jingoism for cynicism!
Swap righteous for fabulous!
Swap fabulous for FLAGulous!

Think of that allAmerican freedom you enjoy:
Tractor Pulls! Pride Parades! Defense Contracts!
Slutty Shirts with LowWaist Jeans! KPFA!
Kids in blockbuster movies fucking apple pies!

Bring everything flagemblazoned you can get your hands on and your
body in. You don't have to buy much; even grocery sacks have flags on
them
these days. Make a cape or something.

Be ready for a surprise AllAmerican Icon and other thrilling parade
guests.

Just be a part of the magic. Let's do Betsy Ross proud, Nellies.

Meet us at Blakes (2367 Telegraph, near Durant) at 12:30, no later
than
1pm. Or ride the official GQB BART train from Powell St at 11:58am
(Pittsburg Baypoint line, transfer in Oakland). We'll be in the last
car on
the train.

Here's a map by the way...

http://www.mapquest.com/maps/map.adp?country=US&address=2367+telegraph
+ave&city=berkeley&state=ca

*** WHAT'S THE OCCASION FOR THIS UNPROVOKED ASSAULT ON SACROSANCT
SYMBOLOGY? ***

We thought this was a joke, but a group of right wingers calling
themselves the Bay Area Patriots Association
(http://www.geocities.com/bapasf) is staging a rally and "teach in" in
Peoples' Park.

Right wingers! Cranky left wingers protesting right wingers! In
Peoples
Park!

We didn't know what to make of this, but then our own Sister Bea (in
boy drag) was flyered by a couple of guys in suits at the Dolores Park
peace rally last week.

We are interpreting this as a sign from God Almighty Himself that we
should support their efforts to "promote patriotism and traditional
American values" by warping this into an absurd spectacle that our
crowd is
uniquely capable of creating, and by CONFUSING THE HELL OUT OF ALL
PRESENT. This will be followed, of course, by binge drinking, ass
grabbing,
bedding barely legal UC Berkeley students, so on and so forth.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Isn't this just a fine country.