Wheatons Dirty Little Secrets

Wheatons Dirty Little Secrets
by DirtyLittleSecrets [at] aol.com 7:14pm Wed Mar 7 \'01


When Tricky Dick went down due to the efforts of
Bob Woodward, history may have turned out diferent
if only the Republicans knew what was happening at the Family home of Bob Woodward back in good old
Wheaton Illinois.

Wheatons Dirty Little Secrets
March 7, 2001

Chicago--Remember those heady days of splendor in
the world of politics when Spiro T. Agnew, and his boss
Richard Nixon became part of the dark history. Nam,
Laos,Cambodia,Co-IntelPro,The Pentagon Papers,
and a zillion other dirty little secrets that tore down
a corrupt dynasty in the Republican Party.

Watergate became a term that the world would never forget, and Bob Woodward became very famous.
Famous enough, that a movie was made in which
Robert Redford played the role of the character known
as Bob Woodward. In the film was the famous line, and
I\'m from Wheaton Illinois,exclaims Redford/Woodward.

Wheaton Illinois,a not so sleepy little town, west
of Chicago by around 20 miles. Staunchly in the grips of the Republican Party, parades on the 4th of July still
host some pretty despicable characters that have run
for the Presidency. The secrets buried safely, flags
waving in the breeze, and the fireworks shoot off at
North Side Park.

T\'was a time that one could not get Cable TV in
Wheaton. They were affraid that someone might say SHIT, or show some titty on their TV\'s. Alcohol was illegal within the city limits, no cable tv, and when it was
time to vote, if you did not vote Republican you did not get the day off from work for the City, or County of DuPage. The good old days of Republican rule reigned
supreme in those days.

Quite the masquerade Wheaton had going for it and it\'s population of around 20,000. Wheaton College
was pumping out the Bible Bangers as they were called in those days, yet, lurking below the surface of this idylic small community was something much deeper than the world believed.

Back then, the likes of John and Jim Belushi
were romping around looking for their next high, party,
or piece of grass. Long before Lord and Lady Q Billiards was shut down after City Officials reliazed that
a whore house was being run out of the attic, one could find the Belushi\'s and all the other party animals arriving at the pool hall seeking their next party. Wheaton was pretty wild in those days, and this was
not something that the Republicans would mention in the Wheaton College brochure. Would\'nt want to upset
Billy Graham, or the other bible bangers thumping away at the hearts and souls of the young.

Meanwhile,there was the Woodwards. A block away from North Side Park in the ritzy side of town. Bob
Woodward had a younger sister named Wendy who
used to date a fellow nicknamed Scratch, (aka Kenny
Heiden).Both were members of the Doodle Gang,
when older brother Bob Woodward was galavanting
around chasing Tricky Dick, et al.


Alfred Woodward, a Judge, father of Bob Woodward, sat on the bench of the Du Page County
Court House back in those days. Wendy still resided
with her father Alfred, near the tennis courts of North Side Park in Wheaton during the Watergate Hearings.
Bob Was still digging up the dirt on the Watergate
Scumbags, while Wendy hung out with the Doodle Gang Members, as Alfred was making the place safer
by sentencing away some of the local riff raff for their crimes. Life was grand.

If only the Republican dirty tricks henchmen knew
of life back in Wheaton during those days, history might
have turned out a little diferent. What if they knew that
Bob\'s sister was growing POT at the Judges house,
right out in the yard for all to see?

Wendy loved to party back in those days, and with
Scratch or the other Doodle Gang Members, the parties
rotated from house to house when the time was right.
The Doodle Gang? Yankee Doodle Burgers, corner of Cole Ave/Main Street was the hangout for the rowdy
teens--20\'s in those days. Henceforth, the Doodle Gang. Mostly schoolmates from Wheaton North High, grads, and dropouts. Getting high was a common practice back then before the days of hysteria with the drug wars. Thats right, the Republicans used to party hearty back then, and believe it or not, Nixon now looks like a Liberal compared to the likes of Clinton or the latest one thats illegitimate.

Like it or not, Wheaton was small in those days,
and at times the good old Judge Alfred Woodward,
had to lock up people that he knew as friends of his daughter Wendy. Doodle Gang Members used to party at the Judges house, or visit Wendy. Two of those members/friends were Bruce Gregory and Bernie Webber. Both were friends with Scratch and Wendy back then, Bob Woodward was still on the trail of Tricky Dick, and Alfred was still on the bench as a sitting Judge. At times, Bernie and Bruce would party at the Judges house with Wendy. It all seemed innocent enough.

Innocent enough, until Bruce and Bernie got desperate enough to rob a Clarke Gas Station one cold
wintery night out on Route 59, near Army Trail Rd. They
got caught red handed by the pigs back then during a
stakeout of the Gas Station. Little did they know that the station was being robbed so often that the pigs set up a
stakeout to catch the armed robbers on the spot.

Mandatory sentence of 5 years was the law back then, there was no way around it for these screwballs of Wheaton. Guess who the Judge was? Thats right, good
old Alfred Woodward, father of Bob Woodward had the case. Like the investigations into Watergate,and the
Hearings, this case of armed robbery dragged on for a bit.

Bernie Webber, and Bruce Gregory made bail,
and coming out of middle class families did not seem to be an impediment. Bernies father was a local Dentist in Wheaton, and Bruce had a wealthy uncle who owned
Narco Development Industrial Co.

Still friends with Wendy Woodward, they were
invited to parties. Parties at the Judges house. They were out on bail, and eventually out on an appeal after they were sent up the river by Judge Alfred Woodward. But they never could get around that Mandatory sentence of 5 years, and ended up doing
their time anyways. But in the meantime, as they were out no one seemed to care that these fellons were getting high at the house of the same Judge that sentenced them to prison not long before. All during the time that Bob Woodward stuck his neck out to get at
the bottom of the Watergate Breakin.

So,there you have the story. Two fellons, convicted of armed robbery partying it up with drugs,
at parties in the house of Bob Woodwards father, the
Judge Alfred, during the investigations that brought down Tricky Dick, et al, known as Watergate.

Would history have turned out differently if John
Mitchell, Gordon G. Liddy, Halderman, Nixon, or Spiro T.
Agnew knew of the shenanigans happening in lovely Wheaton during that period of time? I guess we will
never know. But now you know one of Wheatons dirty little secrets, and that can never be changed.