My visit with Daniel

Saturday morning I headed to the prison. The most beautiful landscape that I saw on my entire trip was, ironically, on the way to the prison. I noticed an entrance to the Sandstone National Wildlife Refuge about half a mile from the point the trees and the road opened up to the complex of FCI Sandstone. Upon my arrival, I found a parking spot and then a guard in a truck came by to tell me I should wait at least 5 minutes before going in because I was early. Apparently others don’t feel the need to ‘beat the crowds’ and be the first one in – my NYC brain didn’t comprehend this! So after waiting 5 minutes, I got out of the car and walked past the employee parking towards the front door. The outdoor prison yard and track is right next to the parking lot (separated by a tall barbed wire fence) so there are a number of signs telling you that communicating with anyone on the other side is strictly prohibited.

I entered the building and was greeted by a woman behind a desk. She seemed to have been settling in just then (she was turning on her computer, hanging up her jacket, etc.). I think she was a little surprised to see someone there so early. But, nonetheless, she greeted me with much more pleasantness than I had experienced when last visiting Daniel in Brooklyn. What was familiar was the procedure of “checking in.” All visitors must fill out a basic form with their own info, the prisoner’s name and register number, your car license plate, model, make, color, and a yes/no checklist of potential contraband that you have on you. Of course, if you’re not checking “no” to all these things, don’t count on getting in! One thing that many people don’t know, due the portrayal of prison visits on TV or in movies, is that you CANNOT bring ANYTHING into a prison except money for vending machines. In Sandstone the maximum amount you can take in with you is $20 and you must carry it in a small, clear plastic baggie and present it before going in. There are certain allowances made for mothers of small children to bring in diapers and baby wipes, but there is a limit to these things too. They even sell tampons in the vending machines since visitors cannot even bring those in! All items you bring in when you walk in the front door you must check into a locker in that room. You are given a key for your locker and you will put everything in there but your baggie o’ money. After all that is sorted, you are walked through a metal detector, your hand is stamped with invisible ink and then you’re cleared to move into the next room. There is never just one door between the waiting/check-in area and the visitors’ room - there are always intermediary rooms (there’s only one here, but in Brooklyn there were 3 so you felt like you were being herding around).

The first day I got there, Daniel was already in the visitors’ room waiting, but the second day I was there first. Unlike MDC Brooklyn, once you get into the visitors’ room you are free to pick where to sit. It varies whether you make it in there before the person you’re seeing does or not. Daniel and I got the same seats both times in the back corner of the room. The room consists of a guards’ desk on the side of the room, about 8 or so rows of plastic chairs, a few vending machines, a change machine, 2 microwaves, men and women bathrooms for visitors only, a miniature bookcase with cards, UNO and some old tattered games and a very small children’s play room with coloring books and a TV. The rules of federal prison regarding couples’ behavior are very strict. When you greet hello and say goodbye you are allowed to “embrace” (kiss/hug) briefly. The rest of the visit is limited to holding hands and putting your arm around the other person – but you have to do this while sitting right next to each other. For me, it was a challenge to feel comfortable and relaxed as if you would at home, given you’re in such a rigid environment. Also, the penalty for breaking these rules is extremely harsh – a visiting husband or wife could be banned from visitation for up to a year and anyone else could be banned for the entire sentence.

After I had been there for about an hour or so I began to feel a little more comfortable. Unfortunately, since you can’t leave the room the entire time, you are at the mercy of the vending machines. Daniel and I ate so much crap it’s ridiculous. It was like being on vacation, but so NOT like being on vacation. In between trips to the vending machines, we were able to catch up on the last month or so. It was really refreshing to be able to just talk. To talk and to breathe. When Daniel was in transport for around 2 weeks, we talked a total of about 1 minute. Even when he’s been at places (like Sandstone) where he has greater phone access, the calls are always limited to 15 minutes. So, when we were able to sit for hours, we weren’t rushed and panicked, we didn’t have to struggle to make every second count or feel like we were losing precious time if we didn’t fill it with words. It was such a content feeling to sit and chat and LAUGH. There were times I sort of forgot where I was. We were back at home, we were cracking up about something really stupid or, at times, we were even debating about something. But whatever it was, we were doing it together, face-to-face, and it made a world of difference.

Daniel seems to be adjusting well. He has a gift for figuring out exactly what he needs to do in order to make his life the best it can be at a given time or in a given situation. He has enrolled in some of the courses and certificates they are offering at Sandstone (and will resuming his Master’s coursework in January). He’s started a workout routine and he’s really trying to get himself more physically fit. As much as he can, he watches what he eats there. It’s not easy since all meals are disproportionately carb-heavy, but he’s trying to balance things out the best he can. Vegetarian options are available at every meal, although that doesn’t mean they’re necessarily palatable! In a previous update I said that Daniel got a job as a clerk in the psychology department but I was mistaken. He’s actually an orderly in the department and will be one until the person in the clerk’s position leaves. Still, it’s a room with AC and the psychologist there seems like a decent person. Overall, Daniel is adjusting and I am trying to adjust with him along the way.

The hardest part of my trip was saying goodbye. I hope to go back at the end of next month for my second visit and will keep everyone posted.

Thanks for all your continued support,
Jenny

PS – A friend of mine passed this article along to me. It’s the first article I’ve seen in a mainstream magazine that deals with having a partner (here, a husband) in prison. Go here to read if you’d like.
http://www.goodmagazine.com/section/Features/chains_of_love

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Daniel McGowan is an environmental and social justice activist. He was charged in federal court on many counts of arson, property destruction and conspiracy, all relating to two incidents in Oregon in 2001. Until recently, Daniel was offered two choices by the government: cooperate by informing on other people, or go to trial and face life in prison. His only real option was to plead not guilty until he could reach a resolution of the case that permitted him to honor his principles. As a result of months of litigation and negotiation, Daniel was able to admit to his role in these two incidents, while not implicating or identifying any other people who might have been involved. He was sentenced to 7 years in prison on June 4, 2007 and began serving his time on July 2, 2007.