Bush abd Sharon in Tiff

Fast breaking news from reliable sources: Sharon has unexpectredly decided to make a run at the Nobel Peace Prize. He has told close advisers that Israel will honor all UN resolutions, just as Abba Even had promised when asking for admittance to the UN some years ago.

He plans to publicly kiss Arafat, and put a stop to all assassination squads. He will hold an emergency meeting with IDF senior officers and reprimand them for accidental shootings that have been made by soldiers. He will also shortly announced that extremist Zionist Rabbi cells will be rounded up and shipped to Northern Afghanistan for missionary work among the Muslim poor.

Insiders say that Mr. Bush was taken by surprise, was upset and chocked on a pretzel when learning of these new developments. He has threatened to cutback on the $3 ,000,000,000 in aid to Israel (by $30,000) It was irresponsible for Mr Sharon to go for peace at a time when Mr. Bush, the popular war president, has been doing great in all big-media polls. It is rumored that he plans refund the $30,000 to American taxpayers. Peace is clearly not acceptable.

Mr. Bush's second in command will be visiting Israeli ASAP as the White House hopes that they can persuade Mr. Sharon into getting back to his old ways. The pro-Israel lobby and the military-industrial folks have warned both Mr. Bush and Mr. Sharon that any peace with terrorists or a cutbacks in aid will simply not be permitted.