BEGIN:VCALENDAR
VERSION:2.0
X-WR-CALNAME:www.indybay.org
PRODID:-//indybay/ical// v1.0//EN
BEGIN:VEVENT
UID:Indybay-18701337
SEQUENCE:18790433
CREATED:20111130T054300Z
DESCRIPTION:December 18, 2011\n7:30 PM\nAdmission: $5.00\nMovies on a Big Screen at The 
 Guild\n2828 35th St, Sacramento, CA\n\nCrappy Christmas 2011 continues 
 with:\n\nThe Christmas Martian\n\nIf you're thinking this is Santa Claus 
 Conquers the Martians, you're wrong.  The Crest is running "Conquers" this 
 year, but this 70s French Canadian disasterpiece is far, far, far 
 worse!\n\nLet's try for a synopsis: A very creepy alien (not actually from 
 Mars, despite the title) with a fishnet over his face crashes his spaceship 
 in Quebec.  Two kids find him while they're out getting their Christmas 
 Tree.  They try to help him fix his ship.  "Hilarity" ensues.  And there's 
 a massive, overly-long and utterly stupid chase near the end.   Want more 
 details?  OK, but there's not much here to work with synopsis-wise… 
 Apparently the "martian" can disguise himself as a lama.  He can fly like 
 Mary Poppins with a magic wand.  He steals junk food that he greedily pours 
 down his throat with almost orgasmic abandon.  He literally showers kids 
 with space candy.  This is worth repeating: he's SERIOUSLY creepy - as in 
 "ordered by the court to not go near schools" kind of creepy.  He learns 
 how to speak French (dubbed into English) by drinking.  And his name is Poo 
 Flower!  You're likely to spend most of the film begging the kids to just 
 get away from this disturbing "martian." This extremely low-budget film is 
 blurry and blown-out most of the time.  There's lingering shots of the sun. 
  There's nearly no plot. There is, however, multiple sleigh rides, hockey, 
 skiing, snowmobiling and snowshoeing. And there's actually not a lot of 
 references to Christmas except at the beginning and the end.   Just like 
 The Magic Christmas Tree, it's really, really bad.  This was made for kids? 
  Yep, it was.\n\n"The Christmas Martian has a bizarreness that makes for 
 compulsive watching in an awful way. The nonsensical runnings around the 
 town play like Keystone Kops capers filtered through an hallucinogenic 
 haze." - The Science Fiction and Fantasy Film Review\n\n"By any regular 
 standards, this movie is atrocious; in fact, it's probably the worst 
 Christmas movie I've seen... It's got no plot; it's just a set of comic 
 setpieces, mostly with the alien (who looks for all the world like a 
 homeless person in a bizarre mask) either flabbergasting adults or playing 
 with children." - scififilm.org\n\n\n 
 https://www.indybay.org/newsitems/2011/11/29/18701337.php
SUMMARY:Screening: The Christmas Martian - Crappy Christmas at Movies on a Big Screen!
LOCATION:Movies on a Big Screen at The Guild - 2828 35th St, Sacramento, CA
URL:https://www.indybay.org/newsitems/2011/11/29/18701337.php
DTSTART:20111219T033000Z
DTEND:20111219T053000Z
END:VEVENT
END:VCALENDAR